June 19, 2006
Rosy
I just came back from two days with my Psychomotor Group. I'm tired, have alot to think and write about, without the energy to put it out to page at the moment. Suffice it to say that issues raised were love, passion, faith, expression, satisfaction, disappointment, life's purpose, meaning, money, food, health, illness, duty, giving and receiving, and the conditon of our world -- you know, the usual.
What's unusual is that we have been exploring these issues for twenty five years together with the intention of not passing on our lunacy to the next generation. as well fulfuilling our own lives in both selfish and altruistic ways, without getting Tal Ben-Shahar. and here are the Cliff Notes.
1. Give yourself permission to be human. When we accept emotions -- such as fear, sadness, or anxiety -- as natural, we are more likely to overcome them. Rejecting our emotions, positive or negative, leads to frustration and unhappiness.
2. Happiness lies at the intersection between pleasure and meaning. Whether at work or at home, the goal is to engage in activities that are both personally significant and enjoyable. When this is not feasible, make sure you have happiness boosters, moments throughout the week that provide you with both pleasure and meaning.
3. Keep in mind that happiness is mostly dependent on our state of mind, not on our status or the state of our bank account. Barring extreme circumstances, our level of well being is determined by what we choose to focus on (the full or the empty part of the glass) and by our interpretation of external events. For example, do we view failure as catastrophic, or do we see it as a learning opportunity?
4. Simplify! We are, generally, too busy, trying to squeeze in more and more activities into less and less time. Quantity influences quality, and we compromise on our happiness by trying to do too much.
5. Remember the mind-body connection. What we do -- or don't do -- with our bodies influences our mind. Regular exercise, adequate sleep, and healthy eating habits lead to both physical and mental health.
6. Express gratitude, whenever possible. We too often take our lives for granted. Learn to appreciate and savor the wonderful things in life, from people to food, from nature to a smile.
From the Guardian: "The goal is not constant ecstasy or gratification," Ben-Shahar says after the lecture is over. "It's a deeper, more lasting, more meaningful flourishing. Pleasure and ecstasy can be part of a happy life, but they can also be part of a very unhappy life. A happy life will have the usual vicissitudes, and trying to avoid those, or hoping not to experience those, inevitably leads to unhappiness and frustration. This deeper kind of happiness has tangible benefits. One famous study, of a group of nuns, found that those with an optimistic outlook on life lived up to a decade longer than the pessimists."
Here's a little Old Dakota on the subject. And of course there is always Esther Hicks, channeling Abraham, who is the best teacher of optimism I know.
Photo note: With gratitude to the Big Baby part of me that loves those beeeeautiful flowers, and insists on taking their pictures-- this being an earl;y summer rose. You just can't help but take a moment to appreciate it's beauty. Done? Feeling any happier? .
Posted by Dakota at June 19, 2006 11:14 AM