May 16, 2006
A Modest Proposal -- Helping Out the NSA
May 16, 2006
Dear Mr. Rove, or maybe Mr. Cheney:
To Anyone in the Upper Echelons Who Hasn't Been Indicted,
Gentlemen and Condi:
It is my contention that this administration is not utilizing one of America's most valuable resources to its fullest.
We have not yet tapped into (pardon the pun) the vast potential power of American Youth . It is time for a new initiative to revive freedom in the heart of America, and in every classroom. Through the public school system across this great nation, we must begin to organize our young people to work for the great goals of America. I leave it up to Mr. Rove to create a good name for this initiative -- Petite Patriots (too French?), Teens against Terrorists, Future Freers of America ? We already have an excellent motto, "Don't be left behind"
Let's put our children to work for us. Terrorist spotting can be easily integrated into the existing curriculum. These kids were raised on the Blues Clues, they'll be great. Put Laura in charge. She's an educator.
As soon as our children are trained to identify terrorist behavior, they can report unpatriotic neighborhood activites and dinner table conversations to their teachers at show and tell. They can print out google search histories for the family computer at regular intervals and turn them in for screening.
Once the kids get the hang of it, the youth initiative can be easily extended to identify illegal immigrants, gays and liberals. The possibilities are unlimited. Think of the time and trouble it will save the NSA.
If any of those liberal teachers (and we know we have a few) object, we'll know who they are. The kids will tell us. We already have their phone numbers, and they can be fired (rendited and tortured) for abetting terrorism. There are plenty of good Christians graduating from college to take their places. We can pare down the education budget , even more with all the money we'll save.
I haven't thought out all the details. A pocket sized little red, white and blue manual of inspirational sayings would be nice, maybe a snappy uniform, some after school seminars on surreptious surveillance or perhaps blind obedence --the possiblities are endless.
Yours in solidarity and safety for all Americans now and in future.
DF
Posted by Dakota at May 16, 2006 06:16 AM